WARNING: Gruesome details
Shortly after I had Jade, Quinn and my parents came into the room to meet her. My sister was so upset that she wasn’t there but there was no way I was going to let her drive all the way from Kingston in a snowstorm. When I was in my room the nurse came in and showed me how to change a diaper and washed Jade off for me. Later on, Quinns family came to visit, my friends, family friends and my grandparents too. Everyone was so excited to meet her. Looking back I wish I had told people to wait on meeting her, I thought that I could handle the visitors since I was running on adrenaline but I realized that was a huge mistake, I should have taken that time to sleep and rest.
After I gave birth I had to wait a little while until I could feel my legs again. They want you to be standing as soon as possible but it took some time to regain feeling in my legs. When I stood up for the first time it felt awful, I still only had a slight feeling in my legs and as soon as I stood up I was dripping blood all over the floor. I kept apologizing to the nurse but she just laughed and said its ok as she cleaned it up. Nurses are incredible they aren’t phased by anything. The nurse helped me waddle to the bathroom and sit down on the toilet so that I could try to pee so that I no longer had to have the catheter in. I sat there for what felt like forever, it was extremely hard to go. As I was sitting there she gave me some massive hospital underwear, a giant absorbing pad that felt like a diaper and two super plus pads stuck together side by side. You would think with all this padding it would last you forever but nope I had to change that every hour since you bleed so much. No words can describe how sore you are after giving birth.
It took a long time until I was changed from my delivery room to the postpartum room. Around 3:00 I grabbed my stuff and a nurse put me in a wheelchair and took me over to the postpartum room. The nurses were giving me Tylenol, two Advil every two hours and oxy every four. I wish I had said no to them when they kept handing me the pills because they didn’t help at all and when you have that many drugs in such a short period of time it really messes you up. Since I had fentanyl, the epidural and so much Tylenol, Advil and oxy when the drugs started to leave my body it made me feel depressed and cry over the stupidest things. I was in a ward which has four beds and I had the whole room to myself which is a great thing but at the time I started bawling my eyes out because the room felt so empty. Moral of the story don’t take too many drugs.
I remember being in so much pain I would struggle so badly to sit up. It was just me at night time and when Jade would cry it would take me so long to try and get her, I would cry in pain just trying to sit up. I would rather give birth then what it feels like postpartum. For weeks after giving birth I was constantly bleeding, clotting and in so much pain that I was still struggled to sit up and get up. I kept praying for the day that I would be able to wipe without pain (since you have to lightly pat) and be able to stand up without pain. Jade is now six months old and I healed amazingly but am still tender. It is absolutely amazing what a woman’s body can do